What is successful parenting?
Around the globe, parents discipline their children in different ways. Some parents use physical or corporal punishment to control and guide children’s behavior. But not all of these parenting strategies are effective and legal. In fact, in some countries, physical punishment (e.g. spanking and pinching) is prohibited.
Indeed, parenting has a huge impact on children’s development. Some research findings found that parental involvement could significantly influence academic success of the children. Therefore, creating a successful parenting plan is necessary.
So the question is how parents should discipline their children? What makes a successful parent? In this article, let me introduce to you some of the best ways to discipline your children.
Successful parenting strategies
Being consistent. Parenting must be consistent. What I mean by this is that parents should maintain disposition over their children. If you say that certain behavior is wrong, maintain your stand. For instance, if you say that smoking is bad never rationalize because you smoke cigarettes. Your words must reflect your action as a parent. Remember that you are the first teacher or the first person a child might mimic.
Don’t raise your voice. Speak naturally but with indignation. If you yell, you send a message to your children that they should listen to you because you are angry. As a result, they will be used to it. Therefore, they will never listen to you unless you yell angrily.
Give them freedom to choose. Although your job as a parent is to guide them, you need to provide room for them to decide. Doing so allows them to develop autonomy. This is necessary for developing independence. Otherwise, children who do not develop autonomy may become dependent on their parents for the rest of their lives.
Treat your children equally. Favoritism may exist in a family. Some parents tend to treat their children differently. But successful parenting does not work this way. Good parenting involves equality in rearing the children. Because favoritism only creates conflict later on among siblings.
Praise your children. Simple appreciation can boost your children’s positive behavior. For instance, if you say, “You are smart and talented,” your child may develop better self-concept or self-esteem. Otherwise, if you say negative things to your child, s/he may develop negative feelings.
Let them know that making mistakes is part of learning. Do not be a perfectionist. Instead, inculcate in your children’s mind that mistake is an opportunity to learn. Teach them to not be afraid of failure because failure is an important ingredient of success.
Teach your children the importance of respect. Respect is an essential feature of a well-educated person. If you train your children how to respect others, they will grow as better members of the society. Their lives will be filled with success. And ultimately, it is your honor as a parent – making you know that you have done successful parenting.
Teach them how to handle finances. Money is part of our existence. And money can problematic if one does not know how to handle. Therefore, early on in their lives, children must be taught correctly on the rule of money. The subject would be about how to earn money (in a legal way) and how to handle it. Money is not evil if we understand and use it correctly.
Teach them how to become responsible. Molding children to be responsible for their actions is essential for their success. Responsible children are trustworthy. They will become successful because they know exactly the importance of time and money. Thus, they tend to maximize the resources to yield the best result of their actions. And most importantly, they are aware of the consequence of their actions.
Successful parenting is not controlling. While this is the hardest part, parents should accept the fact. Children will find their own lives and explore the world. We can not confine them in our home. Life exploration allows them to grow and become better individuals. So set them free when the right time comes.
Successful parents live by example. Parents should not only provide words of guidance but also they must live by example. Children must see good values or virtues on their parents. This is part of being consistent. If children see that their parents are indeed doing the things they teach, it will not be hard for the children to follow. Otherwise, parents will not be effective in guiding their children’s behavior.