The characteristics of a healthy relationship.
Everyone wants a long-lasting relationship. We all want to be happy with a person we chose to be our partner for the rest of our life. However, the road towards a successful relationship is never easy. In fact, some people experience more pain than happiness.
A healthy relationship is not a grass. It does not grow voluntarily without having someone to take care of it. Rather, in order for a relationship to thrive, it needs two people – it needs both parties to work together. The absence of one will have a negative impact that may change the course of a relationship.
1. Realistic expectation
When you are in a relationship, it is most likely that you expect something good. But you should be realistic. You need to accept the fact that problems are inevitable. It is how a relationship works. In fact, a therapist and author, Michele Weiner-Davis said; “Falling in love is easy. Staying in love is another matter. Long-term relationships are hard! There are many, many hills and valleys. Anticipating inevitable relationship challenges and having a plan to overcome them together is the sign of a solid relationship.”
2. Never take things personally
The truth about a perfect relationship is that it is never perfect. Either side can be mistaken. However, couples in a healthy relationship do not blame others’ shortcomings. Instead, they look the positive side of a mistake and fix it. A marriage and family therapist and author, Winifred Reilly stands on the same idea. “Rather than assume the worst, healthy couples will ascribe the best possible motive in the face of mistakes. Forgot to pick up the dry cleaning? Left the car with almost no gas? Rather than think, ‘She doesn’t care about me’ or, ‘He’s just out for himself,’ they think, ‘Even the most loving partners sometimes screw up.”
3. Always accomplish things together
Couples in a healthy relationship never compete with each other. They never treat their partner as a competitor. Instead, they work together to achieve a common goal. Sex therapist, Douglas Brooks, believes that “While it may good to compete in the workforce or in some athletic competition, it is not healthy for couples to compete against each other. Enjoy each other and keep the competition outside of the relationship.”
4. Take responsibility together
Couples in healthy relationships never put the blame on their partner. Instead, they figure out what they missed or undone. Ryan Howes, a psychologist suggests that “Each partner will recognize a problem and look first to how they may have contributed to it. There’s a financial problem? Where did I overspend? Aren’t the chores getting done? What did I miss? It’s not that the blame always resides in one person. In fact, it rarely does, but healthy couples look to their contribution first before asking where their partner fell short.”
5. Trust each other
Trust is one of the essential elements of a healthy relationship. It’s like water that nourishes the tree to grow. The absence of trust will result in an unfortunate situation in a relationship. Sociologist and Sexologist, Pepper Schwartz believes that if couples trust one another, no one will be suspicious. “Both partners have a deep trust and belief in the other person’s loyalty and veracity and are not jealous or suspicious. Healthy couples feel loved and they are not paranoid. They know their partner is trying to protect the relationship.”
I’m a licensed psychometrician, author, and blogger. I’m currently working as a University instructor teaching psychology. I love writing and doing psychological research.